I am not sure if it's due to my pregnancy hormones or if it's really how I feel. I do think it's how I really feel...

I am so over living with family. I can't stand the in laws anymore. They have no respect for privacy and they are rude.

To be honest I don't want my child growing up around them 24/7. I don't mind going to visit every other weekend, but not living with them 24/7. I would not like how my daughter turns out after being around them. One is lazy, the other one is spoiled and they don't have manners when it comes to knowing how to visit someone... even if they live in the back house. Don't just barge in and not knock! They do that all the time. Then they expect for you to feed them and want to do everything together! I just can't. I don't even feel like it's my home with just my husband. I feel like I'm married to all of them. I hate having to walk through their home to leave or come to my house. I hate having to tell them where we are going all the freaking time! I don't even tell my own freaking mother!

I've talked to my husband so many times and I feel like he doesn't listen. Sure he tells me that he wants to leave too but we have to save up money to buy a house because he wants to leave here to buy a house and not rent. UM I DON'T CARE IF WE RENT! I JUST WANT TO LEAVE!!!!!! Even if it's in a one bedroom apartment. I don't care. I hate living here. My mental state here is so unstable.

Everyday after work I dread coming home because we live here. I get so sad after visiting my family and then coming home. I don't feel comfortable being here. I don't feel like I belong and it's sad because I love my husband but I am always feeling shitty.

His mother doesn't censor herself when she speaks. Sometimes the things she says are hurtful. I don't agree with them most of the time and I think I get on her nerves a bit. I can tell. I have never been one to be rude so when she says things I don't agree with I just stay quiet. I feel like I'm beginning to brim at the top and am about to spill over. I don't want a bad relationship with her but I don't think it's fair she can't censor or control her mouth and thinking.

My mother will be taking care of my child once it is born, and I'm quite happy about that. I know my mother in law did a great job raising my husband but I have no idea what happened. Her other three kids are a disaster! They are so different than my husband.

I don't see my therapist until August 5th... Ugh. I feel like my mind is going to implode. It's too much. This really sucks.

I have no idea. I just pray to God everything comes out well. I really do.

I don't want to get to the point of hating my in laws. That would really suck. I kind of already really dislike my father in law. I don't want him anywhere near my daughter. He is plague and just would give grandfathers a bad name.

Ugh.