Tonight was a stressful day and night. I talked with Jonathan and argued with him again. I felt like I always get annoyed and irritated when we talk. So tonight after my class I spoke to him and I just couldn't take it anymore. I told him that I feel like his family is putting a lot of stress on him. Too much responsibility for him as the head of the household even though is dad should be the one with that responsibility.

He said that he saw it from my point of view and he could now see what I mean. It made me feel a lot better knowing that he didn't get upset and we were able to talk and figure out what was happening to us. I did tell him that I was not going to put up with this attitude after our marriage, and he just stayed quiet. I really hope that he actually puts an effort to do something about it, because it's not fair for me to put up with all that and be put second. I know his primary focus right now is his family and the situation they are going through, but I'm going to be his future wife. He needs to start focusing on our future together as a family.

Hopefully our talk tonight helped out a lot because if not, I have no idea what I'm going to do. I love him and I wouldn't want to lose him over his family. I don't know what I would do. It would be hard in the beginning, but I'm sure I'd be okay in the end. The ball in his court, I suppose.